From: GaysvilleAutoSale@FloridaBikeJerks.com
 To: yoricktheprez@hotmail.com
Subject: Link Exchange Request

 Dear owner of <http://www.feralsportscarclub.net>,
                 I'm the webmaster of
<http://www.GaysvilleAutoSale.com>.  We came across your site on the Internet and feel that it would fit perfectly into our collection of quality links at http://www.GaysvilleAutoSale.com/links.php We've already placed a link to your website along with a description at our site on the page, which we encourage you to check for accuracy. Once you place a link back to us, your link will be moved up to a more visable spot on the page.
          We'd appreciate it if you place a link back to our site using the following HTML code (just copy and paste it into your links page):
"
<http://www.GaysvilleAutoSale.com>" title="Gaysville Auto Sales is the fastest way to find a used car in Gaysville Florida. It's easy to search and we have hundreds of listings." Used Cars Gaysville Florida Gaysville Auto Sales is the fastest way to find a used car in Gaysville Florida. It's easy to search and we have hundreds of listings.
      If you'd like the description of your site modified, the category  changed, or if you have any other cross-promotion ideas, feel free to email us.
       Please note that
if you don't place a reciprocal link to us somewhere on your site, the link to your site will automatically  be removed from our directory. A great way to avoid this is to simply  shoot me an email when you put my link up and I will make sure to move  yours up ASAP.
 Best regards,
 John C.
 GaysvilleAutoSale@FloridaBikeJerks.com
PS. We also have a very active blog and if you'd like to trade blog posts, send me a small synapsis of what your website is known for and I'll  write about that! Thanks!

The Link
Hello John C,
          Now let me just get this straight. You want me to include an advertisement of your business on our website, which you claim to have visited, and which you must know, therefore, accepts no advertisements. You must also know that we are Australian, and that most of our punters are Australian and Kiwis, though with 500,000 hits a year we do range a little wider. Not a lot of our punters are likely to want to travel to Florida to buy a car. And anyway what's in it for us? You are going to link our site to yours? Wow! So you want to make money from us, and in return, you are going to mention us? Listen, we don't give a rat's arse about you or your site, and you can shove your idea up your little southern yankee arse.
With Great Respect.
Yorick Cheval


Hay Neddyheddy P
 Howdydoodyyorl from us folks here in Gaysville Flo. I was jiz mozyin down Swamprat Aveenoo to the BIGFUCKERS VERMINBURGER BAR which lil ole me jizt heppens to own when mah peepers spied a lil ole emaciated rat hot footin it outta mahkitchen doorah goin licketyfuckinsplickety. Godamme man effin are wuzn't amayizzed to see  tattooed on that theryah rats arse yoorah
Goddam fuckin website address. Hey Rastus I shouted, Yoofuckinreeker I shouted, Hollee Fuckin Black Prezeedent I shouted, Suckme Blind Monica I shouted...... Oh Lordyfuckin Lordy..ar wuz hit by a  thunderbolt !  Man ! That thereya tattooed rat muztav goddamm swam all the way from Down Under whereya them feralfuckers doan give a damn about rats arses. Thoas doapee fuckers doan hev any ideeah how fingerfuckinlickin good a lil ole rats ass is, slapped betweean a fistfull of lil ole doughboy and dunked in swampcountry gatergravey.  Man NeddyYo ah jiz had to LINK up wiv yorl downunder and tell yer the good news bro. Ahm a gunna put yore name up in lights on my menu board  sumpin like  'Assup downundah - frickassee rats asses n' mash' $2 ol yoo can eat n lik,.'
What in it for yoo ?  Rats ass Man ! Perversions man I Open up franchises man. Gravysodden rats asses man will sell like hotcakes. Franchise in Dayyelzzfoord man - muffdiving for gravy rat - and for those of a vegeetarriann bent , rat insertions . Gerbels are out rats are in ! and just out of town - Muskrat.
So Yo no need to get on your high horse lets Link up Man and dont go givin away rats rings ...theyre worth dosh
Horseless and Remorseless
Big A

The Wherethefuckarewe Trial Email Shitfight.
G'day all,
         quite a lot of responses, and interest in a next Trial. However, I have come to think that Winter is too soon. I therefore propose to hold the next one close to the Spring Equinox, Sept 21.
     The Trophy.
     After the last trial the points scoring is as follows: 1st =5, 2nd=4, 3rd=3, 4th=2, all others get 1 point for attendance.
This obviously puts The Brickie on 5, and Yandoit on 4, in the prime positions. The rest get 1.
    So the next trial will be vulnerable to a dead heat.  I have a contingency plan to cover that, and there might be a run-off, short trial if necessary.
    I also intend to make the next trial easier in relation to feedback if you are right, so that you can more easily backtrack  It's all a work in progress, so let me know what you think.
Cheers Wolf

Wolf you may aswell just give me the trophy now because those nuff nuffs couldnt find there way around there own back yard.You know and i know you could send them into a revolving door and the wankers would come out the way they went in.The only way they will beat my nash is if i run out of petrol and that wont happen
 cheers Brickie


There is only one thing worse than a bad loser........I suspect this is the first time Hammond or Taylor have ever won anything in their entire lives ....... so wank on Brickie, enjoy it while you can. Cheers Yandoit

yep sounds sounds like sour grapes yandoit but you will always come in after the winner when you drive around in a little put put car  and i am picken if you never had your lovely co pilot  {leeyah} with you you would be still driving around now so you best go to the wolfs shelterd work shop for map reading because i might just pinch leeyah for the next trial after all why would a woman want to be with a loser
cheers Brickie


G'day Brickie,
    I reply only as the organiser, but,  is there anyone likely to meet your high standards of navigational excellence?  Helen the Hupp, Norm, Tristan & Klara, the Boys from Oz and the Eldorados, Bull? Anyone? Maybe the calm and measured Robbo?
Wolf

Hi wolf .In reply to your question NO ill explain why .But first if the wankers dont already know i am affectionatly know by woman as Gregory the grouse not just for my good looks and smooth moves on the dance floor but you see wolf i am the only one who passed plasticine at kinda so i have a head start on this mottly crew. So its easy to understand with Victorias good looks and my superior intellect what hope do these poor misfits have.Now ill try to unravel what happened on the trial
First Norm and Hellen its a no brainer post code the minute they leave theres there fucked and far from home  Rick and Barry A models they should take them to the sea drive the fuckers of a pier fish would love to live in them after all there getting driven around by a couple of old mullets now.Greg and his gorgeous wife Pam why the fuck would you build a car that you cant get traction Greg buy yourself a volvo.Elderados well what can you say about wankers who want to chop up good cars they would be driving around with paint fumes in there eyes these wankers wouldnt be able to read a map for tears in there eyes.C.U.N.T.S well usually a beautiful thing but not in this case and maybe the answer for this twisted bunch of C.U.N.T.S in the form of a case of great western plonk or it could be the stupid song they sind to Bull to calm him down
[when i go to reo] Yandoit well he does come from sheep country and sheep are followers stork well he is a trucky they love bituman once they leave it there rattled. Sticks now this crew the poor fuckers they come from Maldon  they have no excuse there was six of them in the car one of them should have been able to read a map ah ah whats that there was only three fuck i am sure i counted six heads.Now wolf you wondered about some others my thoughts .Robbo leaves for louth races gets there a week early tries the next year gets there a week late tries the next but this time gets it right but Wolf yep you guessed it i was there that year to guide him so a big NO to Robbo
Ken i am not sure you see Wolf you dont get mobile service out there no service no google .Plugger and Jen big chance provided jen is on the steer which makes me think maybe those bloks should get there woman to drive ah you can drive andy you will just have to change into your home clothes
cheers Brickie


Brickie, have you considered it has nothing to do with the Nash and everything to do with the awesome female companion that got you over the line? Or the fact that I didn't come and therefore will whoop your scrawny arse on the next rally like I did at pool at the Railway Hotel - for which you still owe me a drink Suck it up princess- I'm going to collect
Bethomatic


Dear oh dear,
I hear you are in the market for a new nav,did you let your no doubt soon to be ex nav & ex friend Victoria know before you tried to steal my lovely nav Leyah?
Why is it that I always see your heavy slug disappearing out of view in my rear view mirror on every run we ever go on? What ever it is you are on Brickie ,half the dose.
Cheers Yandoit


Victoria Regis
Um Brickie, trying to replace me as your beautiful navigator so soon? Don't you think for a minute that it wasn't my keen and correct navigating skills that got us the big win now... and you nearly DID run out of petrol that day buddy so i wouldn't be jinxing yourself with a comment like... "that'll never happen' cause no one will help you if you do, you know that, right?


Hey Boofhead Brickie,
I have a trophy a for you ,its one you are already very familiar with, in fact its dust mark on your mandle-piece is  probably still there.Let me refresh your jaded memory, you won it for nearly blowing yourself up checking the petrol level in the dark  with a cigarette lighter ..............yep its the Feral Fuck Up Trophy,at this stage you are a front runner to score it again.Best wishes Yandoit

Gday Wolf just a thought if the mad fuckers had come on the trial they would not have made it around the course the reason it would be hard to tow a tandem up some of those hills
Brickie

Shame shame shame'' do you all not relize the dark forces at work ,pitting nav against steerer  member against member club against club ,remember the percent of finishers at the half way point  pub for lunch,only one clean nash to be seen ( a near dry tank as usual) the other finisher by  default by all accounts was a lowley snail crossley ( no match for a fleetmaster ).Point here, is was  it a conspiracy,was yandoit a suprise to some to get their the right direction, nepotism  perhaps ,think about it,the Berlin wall was not made of wood, ie a german and a brickie,an  orginiser and a winner ,what the C.U.N.T.S decided after the first turn led us iinto forest roads was  that it was going to be a bit unsafe to to be in the woods around them parts particulary as we had a  13 year old lad with us (shame on you thinking that i work with fucks like you) not far from  daylsford ,seen a lot of strange cars and stranger people alreadywe thought , so we fucked of to  the swap meet ,which was suprisingly how i imagined Rio (note the correct spelling brickie ) (i  guess you are a brickie not a chippie),we walked around a bit ,looked at the poofs and buggered of  for lunch.I can,t be fucked with this shit any more if my spelling is wrong it,s cause im a CUNT
ps fancy bringing the madfuckers into this.
Bull


Hay Yorick you useless fucking nag
 You know the old saying  ( In the used car and brothel biz) : "Cuddle a mug , and he'll die in your arms !" Well, you poor fucker, you,ve won yourself a brickie, worse than that, a Newstead one - for life !  I bet your "contingency plan" doesn't cover that !
Without remorse Your man in the raspberry patch Brer Rabbit

International Clitorus Awareness Week
    And there, mercifully, it ended.
The Wolf
G'day Punters,
            Just to let you know that May 6 - May 12 has been designated International Clitoris Awareness Week. The boys at the Central Unrestored National Treasure Society must be especially excited about this. Got anything planned Bull?
Cheers Wolf

Sorry Wolf ,I asked around and none of us now what a clitoris is ;we assume you mean that french piece
of shit citroen ; the early models looked like a little man in a rowboat so i,m told. We may have a run this
week to the top of th C.U.N.T.s distict ,there is rumoured to be a heavenly garden up there somewere ,
might be good for mothers day.
                                           BULL
Maybe they could hold a little man in a boat race?
Yandoit

Hay Neddyheadjob
Paying lip service to clitoris awareness week is an admirable act you old muff diver you. What about those dicks at Newstead  perpetually celebrating knob weak and unaware of it ? How about announcing, ( tongue in cheeks of course).International freckle fossicking wariness week.
The International Scouting Associations annual "knob a job" week seems to have been hijacked by the Catholic Church's Choirboy awareness Fest so its great that the Girl Guides (and their little Brownies) are being recognised at last for their "penny in the slot" awareness campaign.
Yours without remorse (but VERY WARY),
Mitt Middlefinger.

No good you going in a race Yandoit  you wont win  And if your not aware of it it is hair pie week in Newstead thats what all good Newsteaders are doing this weekend so i wonder why you would be running around racing when you could be home licking hair pie
The Brickie
The Brickie has a point here Yandoit, though he does trowel it on a bit thick. Re- the race, I take you back to the final stages of the recent trial, where you could not control yourself, you had to go the gallop, and came in prematurely. Lost sight of the main game for momentary pleasure
The Wolf